My Secret Superpower

Located in central Tennessee, Deer Run Camps & Retreats changed me in more ways than I can say; Most significantly it strengthened my relationship with Jesus and I am so glad I was able to bring a strengthened relationship home with me, instead of leaving it in the valley. But it was through this change that God was able to work on my heart and heal some old wounds. Though my camp name was Violet, I didn't need invisibility or force fields to experience what God was preparing for me at the end of this past summer.

That being said, not all friendships are meant to last. This unfortunate fact has had a larger impact on my life than I care to admit. And for the story I'm going to share with you, I need to provide you this brief note. My biggest "friend fall-out" happened in 2015, almost 3 years ago, but was slowly developing towards that point over the process of about 6 years. Two friends of mine, *Tom and *Leah, that I had introduced to each other, became better friends with one another (than with me) and long story short, after about two years post-breakup, I had convinced myself that I had successfully phased them out, forgiven them, and moved on for good.

It wasn't until late July of 2018 when I received a message request out of the blue with the words, "Hey Olivia." It was Tom. My first thought was, "no way am I talking to this guy!" But about a week later, I felt compelled to, so I simply said, "Hi Tom."

To be perfectly clear, I was not planning on chatting beyond surface-level conversation with a former acquaintance, but when he asked, "why I'd dropped off the face of the earth last year," I bluntly told him that I that didn't want any of the negativity and drama that came out of a relationship with him so I had stepped away.

Without getting too far ahead of myself, I must explain that I was on my last week of summer camp and on that final Wednesday morning, my group leader gave a devotional where the message was:

When it comes to a person you don't like, or someone who hurt you, 1) Understand that person's value to God, 2) Know your value to God, and 3) Love them.

Basically it was about forgiveness towards those who have wronged you and learning to love them. I couldn't believe what I was hearing applied to me so strongly at that time, but my mind was even more blown when we arrived at our Bible Study that day. Wonder of wonders, the Bible study leader told us he felt called to change our lesson from Jesus walking on water to the parable about the servant who owed his master money.

The master forgave the servant who owed him money, but was angered when the servant refused to show mercy on a lesser man who owed him money. The lesson taught was that we don't have the right to be angry at someone who's hurt us, when we've hurt God so much more. If we fail to forgive others like He forgives us, He will turn His wrath upon us.

The counselors (and campers) were amazed that the Bible story and morning devotion linked so well and honestly, God works in mysterious ways, but right then I felt as if I was being shouted at from on high. For me, the message was glaringly obvious.

I ended up calling Tom and telling him that I forgave him and loved him as a brother in Christ. Yet after I hung up, my heart still felt heavy. That was when I realized I needed to contact Leah. She was a childhood friend and most of the damage that had been done was between her and I. I reached out to her and what followed blew me away.

When I got her up to speed on how all this came about and how I felt called to get in touch with her, I told her that I loved her as a sister in Christ, that I was sorry for things I've done to her, and I forgave her for everything.

Her response:

"I don't even know what to say."

When we hung up, my heart felt lighter than a feather and such a joy was bubbling inside of me so much so that traveled it up to my chest and out of my mouth in squeals of delight. The pure relief I felt and the thankfulness to God for the courage He had given me to say those words to her and mean them had me in awe. There are no words to describe how unreal and yet completely real it all was.

Now, the reason I tell you all this and even take words straight out of my journal is because, upon reflection, I felt that God had been preparing me for this moment all summer. Over the past months, He had put people in my path that would look at me funny, people that might think me strange or unapproachable, and people with no filter from their brain to their mouth when it came to considering other people's feelings.

In that experience, He taught me to think of those people who had hurt me and then to pray for them and love them. He helped me come to the realization that these people were His children, made in His image. God is truly amazing and I am unceasingly in awe of the ways He is working in my life.

So I'm going to share with you my secret superpower.

It is the ability to forgive.

What's yours?

*Names in this post have been changed for privacy purposes.